And it was Diwali…

Photo by Mxsh on Unsplash

Smack! Clash! Thump!

It had started yet again; her parents never seemed to waste any time sitting quietly and normal things. Roshini had curled herself up beneath her bed with a pillow to drown out the sounds of her parents’ daily routine. All the constant yelling, shouting, howling and throwing things, banging doors were giving her severe migraine. She lied there waiting for all of it to get over.

Crash! Screech! Whack!

It seemed like that there was still time left.

These fights didn’t surprise her anymore; she knew from her experience of twenty years that her ‘personal hell’- her house was a ticking time bomb, ready to go off at any moment. She had hoped that this experience will make her used to all of this, it will make it less painful and easy to endure but no, on the contrary it was getting harder and harder for her to crawl out of this. Every time it happened, she would fall into a deep bottomless pit of fear, self-loathing and depression. Previously, she used to wish for her life to get over not that this thought didn’t strike her mind now but today she almost wished the death for those two; it scared her even more and added guilt too to her deep bottomless pit.

Bang! Howl! Slap!   

The pillow was not helping her much and they sure were not in the mood to stop. Long gone were the days when she used to intervene between them hoping to save them from each other but then she got tired of soaking all the blame, tired of caring. Experience was indeed the best teacher!

Desperately wiping the tears of her face, she started scrolling through her Facebook feed to keep her hands and mind busy. Her classmates often used to post photos of their families celebrating something or the other on Facebook, laughing…eating…joking. They all looked so happy in those photos, she had always wondered were all those real/posed or just Photoshoped; she couldn’t imagine what a HAPPY family dinner looks like. Maybe it was all her fault, she was the bad omen.

Immersed in her self loathing, guilt and tears, she didn’t realize when she blacked out due the lack of food, all because of her missed lunch and dinner.

The clock struck twelve at midnight and her phone kept flashing from the wishes and posts of her classmates…it was Diwali!

Diwali (in October this year) is a huge Hindu festival of lights celebrated in India almost by everyone.

Please comment your thoughts.

14 thoughts on “And it was Diwali…”

  1. The synchronization of their raising voices with her sprinting heartbeat and the way she redirected her fear by clinching her pillow even harder is clearly visible in this post. There are some experiences we can sympathies to, some moments we can empathize to. But this, this post was something else. As if I am myself standing there in that dark room at one corner of the bed post of roshini watching her clinching her pillow as she tries to shut her eyes harder. The quarrel coming from outside making her restless as she wraps up herself by bringing her folded knees near her chest and praying for it to end. The realization you brought through this post was commendable. An audacious piece or writing. Must say. Bravo!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow!! I am really ecstatic to hear those words from your end. It is really an honor for me to get my work appreciated by amazing people like you. I am grateful! There is nothing else that will give a writer more pleasure than seeing her work liked.
      Thanks again!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I was pretty pleased to discover this page. I wanted to thank you for your time just for this fantastic read!! I definitely really liked every bit of it and i also have you book marked to check out new stuff on your web site.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Indeed! It’s not a happy ride for anyone involved but I think it’s much more difficult for a child who gets stuck in between.
      Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I appreciate it. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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